Baylee's 1st Birthday

First, I've been working on a post to Baylee but it's taken me so long to get it together and I hit a block everytime I try to write it. So I am hoping to get that posted by the end of the week.

Baylee's birthday was on Friday! I can't believe my miracle is ONE! This year has FLOWN by!! I can't lie the first two months went really slow. I think it was all the lack of sleep but once we got our routine down, time flew. In the custody agreement Cole is to see Baylee for two hours on her birthday so I decided to make the best of it by inviting him to take Baylee to Chuck E Cheese with me. It was a great time to go because we were basically the only ones in the place! Baylee is learning to run so she really loves her freedom now. She was able to run and walk and be silly all over the place. She ate her veggies off the pizza. Not a huge fan of giving her pizza. But I am good with the bell peppers, onions, mushrooms, olives, a little cheese. She loves veggies thank God. After running around and eating we let her ride a few things that were age appropriate. She had a blast. She is so good natured and just loves doing everything (until she gets tired). She is such a joy to be around.

*Now for my thoughts on being with my ex. I hope I don't sound heartless but I don't feel anything for him when I'm around him. I feel mostly irritated at the things he does. I know he doesn't know better because he doesnt raise Baylee so he doesn't know what not to do or give her but it irritates me just the same. I feel irritated that whenever we go out I end up paying. WTF is that?! You don't pay child support the least you could do is buy her lunch, right?! I just sit across from him like he's some random man that I'm trying to be polite to.

Saturday we had her birthday party at the little gym. My good friends and their kids/nephews came. It was so nice to be with people that I love and see our kids play together. Baylee had a ball!!!! She really did. She just loves other kids. I would have had a better time if the ex and his mother weren't there because I felt like I was constantly being watched and judged. It's difficult still. But what matters most is that Baylee had such a good time and she got such thoughtful wonderful gifts.