It's so odd

It's so odd the way people react when they find out you're separated from your husband and about to go through a divorce. Half of the people respond in a nervous laughter and think you're kidding and the other people act like you've just told them you have cancer. So I get "oh yeah right. Really?!?!?!" or "Omg!!! I'm SO SORRY!". I know it's something you don't expect to hear esp since we have such a young daughter and I know you never really know what to say in a situation like that but it often leaves me feeling either very depressed or like a complete and total failure. 

I think FAILURE is such an important word when talking about my feelings lately. When I told my husband I wanted a divorce he told me I was breaking all of my vows to him. And when I first heard this I thought to myself "My God, he's right! How could I break my vows that I made before God and my family & friends?" but after I thought about it for a few weeks (yes weeks) I realized that he broke our vows long before I asked for a divorce. Everyday I wake up and feel like the biggest failure on the planet because I couldn't keep my marriage together. But it isn't that I couldn't keep it together it's that I can no longer take what was being given to me.  I pray that Baylee will not see me as a failure but as someone who was strong enough to walk away while I still could.